Nonviolent Communication in Schools
Nonviolent Communication training and practice in school communities helps teachers, administrators, students, and parents to make school a place where students love to learn, teachers love to teach, and where parents feel confident that their children’s needs—for safety, respect, and learning—can be met.
We know of hundreds of schools around the world that have been introduced to NVC. In many of these schools, teachers, administrators, parents, and students have put it to practice with many of the following reported results:
- fewer conflicts
- increased skill in mediating conflicts that arise
- more listening to one another
- mutual respect among all school members
- students take responsibility for their learning
- more engaged learning
- less resistance & more cooperation
- more fun for everyone
- students and teachers feel safe at school
NVC in Schools Section Contents
To provide information about NVC projects in schools, and to encourage more people to find out what NVC can contribute to your school community, we provide the following information in this section of the website:
| (1) | NVC Materials for Educators; |
| (2) | A description of “Life Enriching Education,” an excerpt from Marshall Rosenberg’s new book, Life-Enriching Education; |
| (3) | A Summary of Four School Projects; |
| (4) | A Project Evaluation by Niclas Ronnstrom, Sweden; |
| (5) | Promotional Materials for Schools; |
| (6) | Opportunities to Contribute to NVC in Schools |
| (7) | NVC Trainings for Educators |
If you have questions about information you find here, or if you would like additional information about NVC in Schools,email Sura.
(1) NVC Materials for Educators
The Following Books & Tapes can be ordered from the CNVC bookstore or +1.800.255.7696 for USA orders or +1.505.244.4041 from anywhere. For other materials see links under resources.
Life-Enriching Education
Marshall Rosenberg presents a radical approach to education, one that serves the lives of everyone in the learning community. This book gives guidelines for creating mutually respectful relationships between students, teachers, administrators, and parents that will contribute to: a supportive learning environment; more cooperation and less conflict; motivated students who love to learn; energized teachers and administrators; satisfied parents.
Endorsed by Dr. Thomas Gordon, author of Parent Effectiveness Training and Teacher Effectiveness Training.
(Published by PuddleDancer Press; 192 pages; 13 US$)
The Compassionate Classroom: Relationship Based Teaching and Learning
Two teachers with 45 years shared experience in education offer: a concise overview of Nonviolent Communication; simple, powerful exercises for students and teachers to explore its philosophical premises; and fun activities to practice NVC skills at school. Teachers who read this book will see how to: vitalize the four kinds of relationships in their classroom; motivate students without punishment or reward; eliminate fear and foster trust; unlock students’ natural desire to learn; and make their classrooms safe places. The authors offer teacher trainings based on the book.
Endorsed by Marshall Rosenberg and Nel Noddings, author of The Challenge to Care in Schools.
(Published by Center for Nonviolent Communication, 2003; 187 pages; 18 US$)
Teaching Children Compassionately: How Students and Teachers Can Succeed with Mutual Understanding
A transcript of a keynote address and workshop given to the 1999 National Conference of Montessori Educators.
(Published by PuddleDancer Press; 48 page booklet; $8)
“
Nonviolent Communication for Educators” (audiotape)
Marshall Rosenberg’s keynote address for the 1999 National Conference of Montessori Educators.
(90 minute audiotape, 10 US$)
“A Heart to Heart Talk” (audiotape)
Marshall Rosenberg’s workshop at the 1999 National Conference of Montessori Educators, showing the application of Nonviolent Communication in school settings.
(90 minute audiotape, 10 US$)
The Mayor of Jackal Heights
9.95 US$ (order#: nvc105)
A boy mayor begins to learn how to tame his town full of jackals with the help of his wise friend, Giraffe. A beautifully illustrated story for children of all ages. (8.5 x 11, 28 pages)
The Giraffe Classroom: Where Teaching is a Pleasure and Learning is a Joy
17.95 US$ (order#: nvc104)
Humorous, creative, and thought-provoking activities. Ideal for teachers, parents, and anyone who wants to use concrete exercises to learn Giraffe Language. (8.5 x 11, 122 pages, spiral bound)
Please, Thank You . . . NEW . . .
14.95 US$ (order#: NVC0601)
A new children's book by CNVC trainer Vilma Costetti, is now available in English from CNVC. This hardcover book focuses on the elements of expressing and receiving feelings and needs and is suitable for children six to twelve. It is beautifully illustrated by Stefania Garuti, translated from the Italian by Federica Rossi and Godfrey Spencer, and includes an introduction by Dominic Barter, coordinator of CNVC's Portuguese Language Project. (7" x 9.75", 23 pages)
Ginny Be a Good Frog
9.95 US$ (order#: nvc0508)
This colorful, illustrated children's book, suitable for children ages 3 to 9, is the product of experimental work in NVC being done in several educational institutions in Italy, and can contribute to greater understanding between parents and children. (6.75 x 9.5, 23 pages)
“Resolving Conflicts with Children and Adults”
An early videotape of an evening workshop with Marshall Rosenberg. It has excellent content but not great video quality; not recommended as an initial introduction to NVC. One videotape, two hours.
25 US$ each (order#s: VHS nvc117, PAL nvc136)
additional nvc resources for educators:
“Encounter: Education for Meaning and Social Justice,” Volume 15, Number 3, Autumn 2002
This issue of Encounter is devoted to Nonviolent Communication and Riane Eisler’s Partnership Education and includes six informative and inspiring essays on the practice of Nonviolent Communication in schools, written by CNVC trainers and NVC practitioners who teach in schools (elementary through university).
To order a copy of this issue, contact Encounter: +1.800.639.4122, email Encounter www.great-ideas.org
Compassionate Communication and Waldorf Schools,
This booklet has a dual purpose: to introduce the practice of Compassionate (Nonviolent) Communication to those interested in Waldorf education, and to provide a useful resource for learning this practice.
To order, visit www.empathy-conexus.com
Feelings, Wishes, Needs, Requests: The Big Book of Games and Activities that Promote Compassion and Community, Soaring Spirit Press, 2002.
For more information and to order, contact email Holley
Feeling Detours Board Game,
A fun way for players (ages 9+) to practice making distinctions between feelings and “feeling detours” such as, “I feel attacked,” “I feel they are being rude,” “You make me mad.” Everything you need to “manufacture” this game is available on disk: game board, cards, guidebook, directions for playing. For more information email Marlene.
(2) Life-Enriching Education
[Excerpted from Life-Enriching Education published by PuddleDancer Press, August 2003.]
Life-Enriching Education focuses on how teachers can provide learning opportunities that will empower students to be an active force in solving human problems. They can learn how to enrich their own lives and help others enrich theirs.
The students coming out of the kind of educational program that I envision would learn to value their autonomy and interdependence, and would have learned the organizational skills necessary to create Life-Enriching systems in which to live their lives.
what you would observe in such schools:
- Teachers and students working together as partners, setting objectives mutually and consensually.
- Teachers and students speak a process language. The one I teach is called Nonviolent Communication, which focuses attention on; 1) the feelings and needs motivating each person and 2) what actions might best meet their needs—at no one else’s expense.
- Students motivated by their eagerness to learn and not by fear of punishment or promise of reward.
- Tests given at the beginning of the course of study to determine need, not at the end to determine reward or punishment. Grades replaced with evaluations of student learning that describe what they had learned—what skills and knowledge they had mastered.
- An interdependent learning community designed to encourage students to care about one another and help one another learn, rather than competing for a limited umber of rewards—a community where the common goal is to support all students in reaching their objectives.
- All rules and regulations being created consensually by the people who are affected by the rules—students, teachers, parents, and administrators. Force only being used to protect needs such as health and safety, but never the intent to punish.
(5) Promotional Materials for Schools
notable facts about nvc in schools
Compiled by Allan Rohlfs, CNVC Certified Trainer
email Allan
- At the International School of Helsinki after introducing and utilizing NVC, occurrences of bullying were reduced by 26% over a two year period.
- In one Israeli elementary school of 730 students, 15% were identified by researchers as regularly using disturbing physical and verbal abuse to resolve conflicts. After receiving training in NVC this percentage declined to less than 5%.
- In four schools in Reggio Emilia, Italy after students received NVC training there was a significant decline in the number of "unpleasant situations" in 5 out of 12 categories for the NVC group while the control group reported no significant variation. The categories were respect for behavioral rules, relationship with teachers, the educational program, care for one's own property, and cooperation among children. The other categories revealed no significant difference between the groups. Additionally teachers in the experimental group observing conflicts reported (1) a reduction in the number of overall conflicts, (2) a reduction of violent conflicts, (3) a decreasing proportion of conflicts in which one party withdrew or ended the relationship, (4) an increase in the proportion of conflicts resolved through talking, and (5) a strong increase in the proportion of conflicts resolved through calling for help from a mediator.
- At Ashkelon, Israel, after the entire police force received training in NVC, the following six months showed citizen charges of police brutality declining by 50%.
- In 1995 UNICEF selected NVC for training in Yugoslavian schools. By the end of 1997 1,500 teachers from 36 towns had received 57 hours of training and were introducing NVC into their classrooms. In 2000 UNICEF renewed its funding to expand this project.
- The European Union selected NVC for introduction into pilot schools in Israel, Northern Ireland, and in the Arab occupied territories.
- Subsequently in 1998 the Israeli government selected and began promoting NVC as a conflict resolution program for ALL schools in Israel and appointed an NVC trainer to a National Education Post to further this effort. By Fall 2000 over 1,000 kindergartens and 100 elementary, middle and high schools in Israel had received NVC training.
- There are over 100 certified NVC trainers providing training in 24 countries.
- NVC was developed when its creator, Dr. Marshall Rosenberg, was mediating school desegregation disputes in the United States during the middle 1960s.
- NVC has been introduced to hundreds of other schools in many countries.
- In 2000 the Center for Nonviolent Communication (CNVC) received its first grant funds (from New Earth Foundation & Threshold Foundation) to formally establish an education division to develop NVC materials and promote the introduction of NVC into school and school systems throughout the world.
School Testimonials
A testimonial from a 2nd grade teacher at Ancona Montessori School, Chicago referring to an NVC school training by CNVC certified trainer, Allan Rohlfs
Dear Allan,
I received your recent request for any supporting information in your effort to acquire funding for programs with local schools. I consider it a critical need and I hope you are successful. You may use or edit my letter in any way you might find helpful.
I have taught a multi-age 1st/2nd grade class at Ancona School in Chicago for 20 years. I consider education in Nonviolent Communication to be critical and essential in our contemporary schools. Children (and adults!) are exposed to many violent messages in our culture and often lack the self-monitoring skills and social skills to cope with these models or to counteract them. Today's children notoriously lack many essential social skills and have little experience negotiating Nonviolent solutions to problems. Many teachers I know also consider it a high priority to teach social problem-solving skills so that the classroom can function well enough to provide educational experiences in academic subjects as well.
I found my workshops with you to be extremely helpful to me as a teacher in my efforts to integrate Nonviolent problem solving techniques into my classroom. This was so for two primary reasons: First, the workshops introduced me to concepts and procedures that trained me personally in how to problem solve in situations of social conflict. Secondly, I was able to adapt the problem solving model I learned in the workshops to work with kids at school as well.
I must stress that it is imperative that adults (teachers) learn Nonviolent Communication and problem solving before they can successfully adapt these to the needs of children. That is where your workshops were most beneficial. The problem solving sessions we had, including many real life role plays under your guidance, helped me to use the concepts in a practical way so that they were more useful when I did transfer them to the classroom.
Let me add that I have also used some of the materials from Marshall Rosenberg in my classroom as well. We use the giraffe puppet frequently—and some children have learned to use the giraffe ears to concentrate on "listening empathically"—to their own needs as well as to those of other kids. The giraffe has been a big hit—and a help—in my room. We have big sign announcing "We are trying to be a giraffe classroom!"—and the giraffe ears hang on our bulletin board for easy access. When visitors come into the room I frequently get quizzed on what a giraffe classroom is--and then I get to talk about one of my favorite topics.
During the month of January our whole school (pre-primary through 8th grade) worked on a common theme—"Journeys". Our class decided to send something special on a journey home overnight with every student in our class. You guessed it; the kids chose the giraffe puppet for this special journey. They took it home overnight one by one and then wrote a passage in our "Giraffe Journal" about the things they had done at home with the giraffe. (Several teachers also took the giraffe home as part of the project.) We now have photos around our classroom from each of our students with the giraffe at home.
When I first introduced the giraffe and jackal puppets I quickly encountered one problem that I have wanted to tackle: Some children felt sorry for the jackal! There perhaps should be a way for the jackal to transform itself so that it can become happier and more peaceful, too. Needless to say, I have primarily used the giraffe and only occasionally used the jackal for illustration.
Our school has just completed training in the Second Step method, which will be implemented in all classrooms. Personally I consider Nonviolent Communication to be an important element of the whole framework presented by Second Step. Second Step was appealing to the faculty because it is a fully developed program, but I have recommended the NVC training to several of my colleagues.
Very sincerely,
John Zurbrigg
Ancona Montesorri School
4770 S. Dorchester
Chicago, IL 60615-2023
The following is a testimonial from the (now former) Dean of Students at Midland High School, Los Olivos, CA, after series of NVC trainings by certified trainer, Sura Hart.
Dear Sura:
I am writing to thank you again for the Nonviolent Communication work you and Chrissy have done at Midland School. The lessons you have taught us have changed the way we speak with each other and drastically changed the tone and content of our conversations.
Midland, as you are well aware, is a tight-knit boarding school community. One hundred and twenty of us live, work and study together seven days a week. As one can easily imagine, our days are filled with passionate conversation.
Nonviolent Communication (NVC) has given us a language to use in having those interactions. We are a community that has begun to recognize that all communication is about the meeting of our individual needs. This recognition has become a simple and tangible way for us to transform the way we speak to each other. Its benefits are most pronounced in dealing with difficult interactions like arguments, but it is a language that is applicable in all of our daily interactions.
What has been most satisfying to me about our experience with NVC has been the feedback I have gotten from Midland’s students and faculty. Students have reported to me that the practice of NVC has totally changed their relationship with their parents. Disagreements that used to become full-blown fights now become passionate conversations with each party expressing his/her needs. Students and parents walk away from these interactions feeling satisfied, rather than angry. Likewise, students have said that NVC has greatly helped them in their interactions with peers. Sometimes students forget the lessons of NVC and argue with their peers. They then rehearse and complete another conversation using NVC and the outcome is far more positive. You can only imagine the look of satisfaction and understanding on their faces after their effective use of NVC. Finally, faculty members have used NVC in dealing with both students and faculty alike. It has become a most powerful tool for us.
For my part, NVC has changed my job as Dean of Students. No longer am I saddled with angry interactions for which I later feel embarrassed. I am able to treat my students with compassion and view our conversations as a mutual meeting of our needs.
We still have a long way to go at Midland before we could consider ourselves a giraffe community. More of our students need to learn your language as do the bulk of our faculty. With this in mind, I look forward to having you back again this year to work with us and hope that Marshall Rosenberg can find the time to come work with us as well. Finally, please know that I would be pleased to speak with any other school that is considering bringing NVC to their campus. You would have only my highest recommendation.
Thank you again for the tools you have provided us. We will use them to build a more respectful, more compassionate community.
Sincerely,
Eric Feron Niles
Dean of Students
(6) Opportunities to Contribute to NVC in Schools
- Scholarships for Teachers: If you would like to contribute much needed financial resources for NVC school projects, please send your tax-deductible donation to “CNVC” and earmark it for “Education.” You will find directions for donating on our donations page.
- If you would like to dialogue with other educators interested in practicing NVC in classrooms and school communities, you can join an email group: EdGroup@yahoogroups.com.
This is a TWO-way interactive email forum/community of those interested in NVC in Education. Subscribers can dialog with others, retrieve related documents online, ask questions, schedule online chat sessions with other members in the 'Chat' room, and more.
To join this email group or get more information about it, click on this link: EdGroup You can unsubscribe anytime.
(7) NVC Trainings for Educators
Click here and then select "nvc for educators" from the topics list to see a listing of current and upcoming Trainings for Educators offered by certified CNVC trainers is available on this website.
Dear Friends,
At a time when so many of us are longing for hope for a peaceful and sustainable world, we invite you to take a moment to imagine—with us—our young people empowered with vision, hope and effective tools for creating peace. Imagine schools where young people learn, along with Reading, ’Riting, and ’Rithmetic, the fourth vital “r”, Relationships, practicing how to communicate honestly and compassionately and resolve conflicts nonviolently. Imagine our schools and classrooms as safe and caring communities, fostering understanding, respect and cooperation, Imagine young people, our future leaders, with the skills necessary to create organizations, businesses, governments, and a world where everyone’s needs matter and can be met.
This is the dream that launched the first NVC Educators Institute in Olympia, Washington, in the summer of 2001. A team of NVC trainers met with 25 teachers from various parts of the U.S. and immersed ourselves in processes and activities that deepen the consciousness of Nonviolent Communication and that strengthen the vital skills of relationship and peacemaking. Fun and laughter accompanied our days of learning together and several participants commented that it was the most active and fun NVC workshop they had participated in. At the end of five days, teachers returned home with new hope, new and sharpened tools, and a network of support that they can call upon throughout the school year.
The same quality of deep and engaged learning through play and community has been evident in subsequent Institutes. These comments from teachers who have attended the Institute are typical:
“I am writing from a place of deep gratitude after returning from the Educators Institute. My needs for learning, connection, hope and inspiration were met in a profound way; I so appreciate the many opportunities to learn through a variety of styles.”
“I learned a new way to communicate and connect with kids. I got to connect with a group of people like never before. The five days were full to the brim of learning and “a-ha” moments. It was truly heart and mind opening.”
We are very pleased that there will be two Educators Institutes in the USA in 2007, one on the west coast and one on the east coast. We have room at each event for forty teachers to join our local and international training team for another extraordinary learning experience that will help us dream a new world into being.
You can contribute to this dream in the following ways:
1) Come to one of the 2007 Educators Institutes:
July 6-11 in Friendly Crossways Retreat Center, Harvard, MA;
July 23-28 in Harmony Hill Retreat Center, Hood Canal, WA;
2) Tell teachers, school administrators and staff, and parents about the Educators Institute;
3) Donate to our scholarship fund (any amount gratefully received) so that teachers who are not able to afford the cost of tuition (which is most of them) can participate in the Institute. For information on our scholarship fund,email Sura.
With warmest wishes,
Founding member of the NVC Educators Institute
CNVC contact for U.S. School Projects
If you would like more information please contact Sura Hart at +1.805.698.3332 or email Sura